This song is really simple Capo on 3rd fret EGDC E|-0----3----2----0-| B|-0----0----3----1-| G|-1----0----2----0-| D|-2----0----0----2-| A|-2----2----X----3-| E|-0----3----X----X-| Verse 1: E All my days, G D E I live with my disgrace G D E I'm afraid to show my face G D C Or at least take off my underwear... E See I was born G D E Like a half way neutered pet G D E I don?t have a matching set G D It?s a part of me C That just aint there Please, don?t stare Chorus E G Well I?m a gambling man with out two dice E G I?m like Uncle Ben with only one grain of rice E G Oh to have two testis would be so nice D C E But I?m half a man D C E Yeah, I?m half a man Verse2 E Wanna die G D E end it all, just call it quits G D E I can?t find a cup that fits G D C And at baseball games I feel so dumb C When I hear ?ball one? E Oh, my God G D E How could you have been so cruel G D E To give me one family jewel G D C And the one that?s there must feel so sad C He?s a lonely nad Chorus 2 E G Well I?m a marathon runner with just one leg E G I?m a fallopian tube with just one egg E Oh, I want another testi G Do I have to beg? D C E I?m half a man D C E Yeah, im half a man Bridge E..G...E...G...E...G...D...C kinda like chorus Chorus 3 E G Well I?m a tweedle dee with no tweedle dum E G And I?m a Siskel and an Ebert with just one thumb E G And I?m a Yo Ho Ho with no bottle of rum D C E I?m just half a man D C E Yeah, I?m half a man